How to Get Your Teenager to Want to Go to Church

March 9, 2021 John Beeson

Every other Sunday I pick up my twelve-year-old nephew at 6:30am. He piles into the car alongside my fifteen-year-old son and seventeen-year-old daughter. What could possibly drag these three students out of bed at such an hour? They serve on the tech team at New Life.

Do I have to cajole them? Beg them? Bribe them? Nope.

After we get back from a long Sunday morning, we’ll enjoy a late lunch, some time of recuperation, and then they’ll be headed back out of the house at 4:30 pm for our Student Ministry, where they will play on the worship team. They’ll also insist on going to the tech team hangout Monday night and they will be at church Thursday night for worship and tech team practice. They’ll do it all with joy.

Studies show us the challenge it is to keep young adults engaged in church following their high school graduation.[i] 66% of 18-22 year-olds who regularly attended church during high school dropped out for at least a year during those transitional years. How can we do a better job of launching teens into a commitment to Christ and his church following high school?

We recently celebrated Student Ministry takeover weekend at New Life. Our Student Ministry Team led the worship service, students welcomed guests, students ran tech. You know what was strange about it? It wasn’t that much different from our regular services. That’s because when we think about leadership development at New Life, it doesn’t start once you’ve graduated from high school.

Who doesn’t want their child to be all-in on church? Who doesn’t want their grandchild to be excited about going to church? Who doesn’t want their child forming meaningful relationships in a Student Ministry? Who doesn’t want their grandchild shaped by the power of the gospel in community?

What’s the secret sauce to making this happen? I would suggest that perhaps one of the most powerful contributing factors is having your student invested in church. God doesn’t give us a gifting after we become adults. Students aren’t junior members. They are part of the family of God.

When Paul talks about spiritual gifts in the family of God (see 1 Corinthians 12, for instance), he never hints that we get these gifts in adulthood. As Paul mentors the young Timothy in his pastoral ministry, he urges him, “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation, to teaching. Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you” (1 Tim 4:12-14). What would it look like for us to urge every one of our students to “not neglect the gift” they have?

Invite your students into ownership and they will have a very different perspective of church. Do you want your teen to want to go to church? Invite them to serve, greet, and lead at your church. Unleash their gifts for the sake of the body and let them be contributors, not just consumers.

Next week I’ll consider other factors in fanning the flame of your child’s love of Christ and his bride.