Christian Living, Biblical Studies, Religion, Spiritual Growth, Theology
John Beeson
The Faith of Unbelief

Bart Ehrman has perhaps done more to undermine the credibility of the Bible than anyone else in my lifetime. But his story didn’t begin that way. Ehrman is a New Testament scholar and skeptic. Ehrman grew up in a Christian home, attended a conservative Bible school, and then found his way to a liberal seminary where his faith in the God of the Bible unraveled. That seminary happens to be the seminary I would attend a couple of decades later.

For Ehrman, everywhere he looks he sees holes in the biblical story. The inconsistencies that he sees have led him to determine that he cannot trust in the God of the Bible.

The Faith of Unbelief
Christian Living, Culture, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Don't Numb Your Feelings

“Don’t listen to your feelings; remember what Jesus did for you!”

“Don’t be guided by your feelings; listen to what God commands you to do!”

In just the past week, I heard both of these warnings. Two very different Christian speakers urged their audiences to shut down their feelings. These admonitions resonate. They contain truth. It is correct that our feelings don’t override truth, nor do our emotions negate what God has done. Neither do our feelings give us an out for what God commands us to do.

Don't Numb Your Feelings
History, Spiritual Growth, Suffering, Wisdom
John Beeson
Lord, Reach Your Justice Down

I had outsized emotions as a child. Games, especially, would get the best of me, whether cards or boardgames or sports. In response to a stroke of bad luck, a hot surge of anger would erupt, followed quickly by tears and then embarrassment.

Emotions are God’s gift to us in many ways. They are one of his kind ways of showing us where our deep attachments lie.

Our son started his freshman year at the University of Arizona this fall. It’s been a great experience for him, but not without its adjustments. The climate of a secular school is quite different than the Christian school he graduated from

Lord, Reach Your Justice Down
Culture, Generosity, Nature, Relationships
John Beeson
Marshmallows and Friends

Most have heard of the famous Stanford marshmallow experiment. In 1970, psychologist Walter Mischel invited kids into his lab. A child was offered a marshmallow that they could eat, or, if they waited until the researcher returned, they were given a second marshmallow. About one-third of the kids waited approximately fifteen minutes for the additional reward.

The study then tracked those children over time and found that children who waited for the second reward tended to have higher SAT scores and lower body mass indexes. Later tests have challenged those outcomes, but it hasn’t stopped parents everywhere from running the experiment on their kids, often with humorous results.

Marshmallows and Friends
Christian Living, Culture, Politics
John Beeson
Uprooting Our Political Identity

Happy election day!

In 2016, data scientists Eitan Hersh and Yair Ghitza analyzed data among registered voters to determine how often Democrats and Republicans married. They learned that 9% of marriages had the spouses registered in the two parties. Over the next four years that meager number would drop precipitously, down to 4%.

 As Jonathan Haidt and others have successfully argued, the ideological disparity between FOX News and CNBC are child’s play compared to the engineered social media algorithms that create hermetically sealed echo chambers for our political views.

Uprooting Our Political Identity

Marriage

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Reflections on 20 Years of Marriage

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Reflections on 20 Years of Marriage

In January, Angel and I celebrated 20 years of marriage. If you’ve been a reader of this blog for a while, you know what a miracle that is. It is a gift to be able to celebrate his goodness and faithfulness.

Angel and I met in high school. She was a freshman, and I was a junior. She set her sights on me. I was oblivious… until I wasn’t.

After a long-distance courtship, we married at the tender ages of 21 and 19. I often tell young couples I walk through pre-marital counseling with that marrying early comes with unique gifts and unique challenges. There are gifts of getting married young. Those include the blessing of a long history with someone, protection from certain sexual temptations, and leaning into responsibility earlier than most.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Marriage in Rapid Decline, Even Among Evangelicals: Colin Smothers shares some startling and disheartening news, ““According to a Census Bureau survey taken in 2018, only 35 percent of 25- to 34-year-old men were married, a precipitous and rapid plunge from 50 percent in 2005.”

2. 10 Things Pastors Should Know About Divorce: Speaking of marriage, this is an excellent article from Laura Petherbridge. Her first of the ten is that “Divorce is a death: Regardless of the circumstances, divorce signifies the fatality of the marriage vow. It’s the death of the dream, the breaking of the covenant, the ending of ‘what should have been.’ It often feels as if death would have been easier because death is natural and doesn’t carry the shame.”

3. That Feels Nice: I could read Chris Thomas’s lyrical writing all day long. I love this reflection on sin and the weight of the crashing ocean.

4. Painting on the Surface of Water: Wow. Mesmerizing, indeed.

5. Beware the Danger of a Victim Mentality: This article from Akos Balogh, an immigrant now in Australia, is very helpful. He begins, “I was a refugee from communist Eastern Europe—from Hungary. I grew up among other refugees, among victims: victims of an oppressive totalitarian regime; victims who saw loved ones imprisoned and killed; victims for whom fleeing their homeland was often the only option left. Now not for a moment do I want to minimise the suffering of my fellow (Hungarian) refugees. Their pain was real.”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Confessions of a Recovering Political Idolater: I resonated with Jared Wilson's post. He says, "I have to stay aware of them, because when I am not consciously and intentionally directing my gaze to the glory of Christ, I can very easily get swept up in the winds of political discourse. I can get too animated by the rise and fall of those who cannot thwart God's purposes. I can get too angry or too disappointed in or too fearful of brothers and sisters who don't think about these things exactly like I do."

2. 4 Types of Churches in Dealing with Politics: Eric Geiger reflects on how churches tend to engage politics. Most importantly, we need to be those who can be offended and changed when the Bible confronts even our political ideologies. “I heard Tim Keller say in a sermon about the Bible: ‘If the Bible really came from God, and wasn’t the product of any one culture, wouldn’t it offend every culture in some way?’ He was not speaking about the Republican and Democrat parties/culture, but I believe the quote applies.”

3. How to Avoid Becoming the Leader Everyone Resents: Helpful advice from Carey Niewhof. He begins, "There is no level of leadership that exempts you from your weaknesses. You can lead one of the largest organizations in the world. You will still have weaknesses and frustrate your team. In fact, higher levels of leadership don’t mask your weaknesses, it exposes them."

4. Still Growing: Melissa Edgington always puts simple truths elegantly. Here she reflects on 21 years of marriage, "When I stepped through the back doors of the church back in 1999 and saw that precious boy that I loved standing at altar, I had no idea that knowing him was going to make me more like Jesus. We have grown. And we’re just getting started."

5. 2 in 5 Churchgoers Regularly Attend Multiple Churches: And four other church trends. An eye-opening read. Aaron Earls reports. In more encouraging news, "Two-thirds of churched adults (65%) and 82% of practicing Christians say they attend church because they “'enjoy doing it.'”

6. For Passion’s Sake: My friend, Anne Imboden just launched her blog at Glory in the Grind. You should subscribe. Her storytelling and sense of humor are great. Here she reflects on her kids and the worthwhile cost of fostering their passions, “It’s both inspiring and exhausting to have a 5 year old who loves to cook. Fueling his fire and encouraging his dream means I need to learn to share my kitchen and resign to the fact that it will never truly be clean again. It means I need to include him on my menu planning, letting him choose recipes from his own cookbooks and kits. It means I need to start preparing dinner at least 30 minutes earlier than usual to allow time to show him each step, wait on his slower motor skills, and clean up mistakes. It means I need to die to myself a little and let go of control, for the sake of supporting his passion… He is capable, and I need to give him opportunities to prove it. (Dinner was delicious.)”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Should Christians Use Recreational Marijuana? Kevin VanHoozer offers wisdom to Christians in a nation with broadening availability to recreational marijuana. VanHoozer explains that we need to have an understanding of what marijuana does as well as a biblical understanding of recreation. He says, "'Recreation' originally referred to the process of spiritual refreshment: the act of restoring or reviving the soul. Today, it usually refers to things people do to relax or have fun. Recreation is an activity of leisure—leisure being “free” time. It can be solitary or communal. In either case, it is formative, either spiritually or socially."

2. It's True! Stress Makes Your Hair Grey: Sometimes old wive's tales are real… and I’m living proof of this one! Jennifer Walter reports, "Scientists knew losing these cells in hair follicles robs hair of its luster, but they had yet to pin down the mechanism responsible for triggering the depletion of melanocytes. Now, scientists finally have an answer: the fight-or-flight response."

3. Marriage Was Never Meant to Fill the Empty Spaces: An excellent and intimate reflection by Lauren Washer. She reminds us, "Marriage cannot fill the empty spaces but it helps point us to the God who emptied himself so we could be filled up with the knowledge of him. As we continuously seek to fill ourselves up with the knowledge of God, through his word and through prayer, he fills us with everything we need for life and godliness."

4. Respectable Sins of the Reformed World: Tim Challies offers an important critique of the sins that can go unchecked for Reformed Christians. He concludes his list with this doozy: “Impugning. To impugn is to dispute the truth, validity, or honesty of another person’s motives. And closely connected to disputing another person’s motives is suggesting that you know the truth behind them.”

5. Kangaroo Rats are Furry, Spring-Loaded Ninjas: As an Arizonan I particularly enjoyed these four-minutes. Our Creator has quite the imagination, don't you think?

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Visualize the Entire World's Wealth Inequality: Howmuch.net reports, "The Swiss are the richest with median wealth per adult at $227.9K. Haiti is the poorest country in the world with an estimated median wealth of only $214 per adult."

2. Nearly Half of Men Say They Do Most of the Home Schooling. 3 Percent of Women Agree: Ruh, roh. I smell marital trouble brewing. A recent Morning Consult survey revealed that 45 percent of men say they were carrying the bulk of the load for homeschooling—but only 3 percent of women actually said their partners were taking care of most of it.

3. Fandom Proves We Need Community: Eric Geiger shares, "Eric Simons quotes scientists, researchers, and psychologists who have studied what motivates a sports fan. The conclusion is a longing for community."

4. Why Our Modern World Can’t Stop Guilt: My friend John Starke considers why it is that a modern world that has seemed to throw everything it has to get rid of the outdated concept of guilt can’t seem to shake it. Starke concludes, “As Rich Plass has said, the soul will always find its way out. It’s true. Modern people try to bury their guilt before it’s dead, and like a zombie, it comes back to the surface in a more dangerous and wild version than before.”

5. A Husband's Perspective on His Wife's Postpartum Body: Tim Challies with a loving reflection on what a postpartum body means. He concludes that the husband considers his wife's body, "With gratitude, acknowledging that she has sacrificed her body so they could enjoy the thrill of pregnancy, the joy of children, and the blessings of family. And with desire, still longing to experience and increase the intimacy that has bound them together for all these years. He treasures each mark and each line as if they are his own. For in the sacred oneness of marriage, they are his own."

6. I Miss Baseball: Me too, Kevin James, me too.

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She Wanted Out: Navigating an Unwanted Divorce

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She Wanted Out: Navigating an Unwanted Divorce

I’m so glad to be able to bring you a guest post from my friend Wes Jackson today. Wes has been a friend of mine since Middle School and brings transparency and wisdom to this sensitive topic. I’m sure you will benefit from navigating his experience of divorce and I encourage you to share it with friends who would profit from his insight as well.

Grace and peace,

John

When Divorce Happens: Through a Husband’s Eyes

It was Halloween Day, 2017, when my ex-wife told me she wanted a divorce. This announcement didn’t come completely out of the blue. We were ten days out from our last big fight, and it was only eight days since she sat me down to let me know that she wanted to stay together through the holidays for our kids’ sake and then separate in the new year.

We had been married for about eight and a half years and they were very difficult years together. We had tried Christian counseling. We’d met and prayed with our pastor. I thought we’d tried about everything possible and maybe separation wouldn’t be such a bad idea. We could give each other some space so things could cool down while we continued to meet with our Christian counselor with the hope of reconciling the marriage.

When her desire for a separation changed to a desire for a divorce, everything became much more difficult.

What followed was six to eight months with attorneys and paperwork and appearances in the Arizona Family Court system. During this time, I made three separate overtures to try and reconcile the marriage, but all of them were refused. My wife made it very clear that she was done with the marriage and had moved on.

While I can honestly say that I didn’t want to divorce my wife, I can’t say that I should have been surprised that she wanted to divorce me.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       The Average American Hasn't Made a Friend in Five Years: Oh my, this is disturbing news in a new study commissioned by Evite. And the friends we do have don't appear to be that close: "So what about the friends we already have? According to the survey, the average adult has 16 current, active friendships. Of those friends, three are considered friends for life, five are worthy of a one-on-one hang out session, and eight are generally well-liked but not enough to hang out with in person all that often."

2.       What Are Your Sexpectations? Expectations regarding couples' sex lives can be destructive. I appreciate this article's comparison of cultural verse biblical expectations for sex.

3.       5 Keys to a Great Apology: Carey Niewhof begins, " Two of the most powerful words a leader can utter are simply “I apologize”."

4.       Things Stay-at-Home Mothers Aren't Allowed to Talk About: Melissa Edgington concludes this thoughtful post with this perfect conclusion, " Emerald made me a card this weekend, saying she loves it that I “didn’t want a job.” I have never specifically talked with her about being a stay-at-home mom, but at seven years old she is already understanding a little bit of my heart when it comes to our family. I don’t know if she’ll wind up being the PTO President or a CEO, but if she chooses to stay home with babies, I pray that she will find in it the complete joy that I have. Because this world needs kind and artistic and smart and funny women like her in the kitchens and the laundry rooms and the carpool lines, and there is nothing at all wrong with her giving herself to her family, undivided."

5.       Vorticity: Mesmerizing cloud formations.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       Modern Research About Happiness Repeatedly Reflects Biblical Principles: Randy Alcorn walks through eight findings about happiness from psychological research and their eight biblical parallels.

2.       The Top 50 Countries Where It’s Hardest to be a Christian: Of particular interest to me is India not only remaining #10 on this list, but unfortunately taking the top place in a new designation. Jayson Casper explains, “India ranks first in the new category of physical or mental abuse, which includes beatings and death threats. The continuing rise in the subcontinent of a militant Hindu nationalism contributed to 1,445 of the reported 14,645 cases worldwide.”

3.       Patrick Lencioni's Personal Leadership Crash: This Carey Niewhof podcast is gold. It's loaded with helpful leadership insights about a leader's health.

4.       National Giving Trends: Lifeway recently published a report on national giving trends. A few takeaways: the national giving percentage has remained at 2% for decades. Diving deeper, "giving to religious causes receives the largest amount of gifts when compared to other sectors. It is at 31%. However, in the 1980’s, religious giving received 58% and has been on a steady decline every year. This is not good."

5.       Can The Cosmic Crisp Live Up to Huge Expectations? You might have heard of the new breed of apples that just hit store shelves. But can the apple pay back the huge investment that has been made in it?

6.       What Does the Bible Say About Divorce and Remarriage? Tom Schreiner answers this difficult question.

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Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs

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Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs

Love and Respect was published in 2004 and has been a massive seller in the Christian community—outpacing every book but Gary Chapman’s The Five Love Languages over these past fifteen years. Having finally read Love and Respect, I have mixed emotions about Emerson Eggerich’s blockbuster.

Eggerichs aims to balance what he feels has been imbalanced teaching on marriage, where men are lambasted for not being the husbands they ought to be while women are largely just told to be patient with their husbands. Drawing the foundation of his book from the conclusion of Paul’s admonition to husbands and wives in Ephesians 5:33, which calls men to love their wives and Christ loved the church and wives to respect their husbands, Eggerichs tells his reader that the key to marriage is husbands loving their wives well and wives respecting their husbands.

While the Beatles belted out, “All you need is love,” Eggerichs contends that “love alone is not enough.” Love is only half of the equation. Without respect, marriages will crumble.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       3 Reasons Your Church Shouldn't Be a Perfect Fit for You: Daniel Darling concludes, "Too often our fights aren’t good fights. They’re over preferences and an unwillingness to die to our preferences in order to give, serve, and love our brothers and sisters in the Lord. Not only should you have things in your church you don’t like, you should embrace the privilege of the opportunity to grow in a community that will be used by God to sanctify you."

2.       I'm So Glad Our Vows Kept Us: Jennie Cesario is a masterful writer. Here she reflects on the difficulty and beauty of marriage. Please read this in its entirety. Here is a taste: " Our hearts are so very tender toward one another now with the long years, softened to a sweetness hard-won."

3.       5 Questions to Discern God's Will: Juan Sanchez with sound advice: " [W]e don’t have to fear what God wills for us. And thankfully, God has revealed His plan and purposes—His will—by His Word (Deuteronomy 29:29). We’re not in the dark about what God desires."

4.       How to be an Appropriately Transparent Leader (Without Oversharing): Carey Niewhof packs in a lot in this helpful post. He concludes, "I find often that the speakers or writers who overshare are people who are processing something for their benefit, not for the benefit of their audience."

5.       12 Fascinating Archaeological Finds in 2019: The finds include a $26.8 million Renaissance masterpiece that was hanging in an unsuspecting French woman’s kitchen and a perfectly preserved 32,000-year-old severed wolf head found in Siberian permafrost.

6.       An Unexpected Duet: Wait until 74 seconds in for the "what?!"

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