David Powlison

Should My Counselor Be Licensed?

Should My Counselor Be Licensed?

Looking for a counselor can be overwhelming. How do you know if they will be good? Are they properly trained? Are they a Christian? If they are a Christian, how much does their Christian worldview shape their counsel?

 

One of the most frequent pieces of advice I hear is to seek out a licensed Christian counselor. I recently finished a book by a counselor I respect who offered this advice a number of times throughout her book. Near the end of the book, she explained that she urges people to seek a licensed counselor because licensure certifies that the counselor has received proper training and isn’t offering faulty or half-baked advice.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Britain’s loneliest sheepStephen Steele begins, “A high-profile new resident arrived in South West Scotland recently – a ewe once known as ‘Britain’s Loneliest Sheep’. Fiona, as she has been named, was rescued after being stranded for more than two years at the foot of cliffs in the Scottish Highlands.”

  2. When the walk becomes a crawlDavid Powlison exhorts us, “The key to getting a long view of sanctification is to understand direction. What matters most is not the distance you’ve covered. It’s not the speed you’re going. It’s not how long you’ve been a Christian. It’s the direction you’re heading.”

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Gospel Hope for Self-Haters: David Powlison with a layered analysis of something many struggle with. “He is actually saying something that competes with the false voices, and it is not just something you rehearse in your own head. He’s actually inviting you to come out of yourself, out of the death spiral, the vortex of self-hatred, as we are talking about it right now.”

  2. Men and Emotions: I’ve spent a lot of time working with men on this issue (and myself!) and love Joseph Hussung’s approach. He explains, “The purpose of using these tools is simple. We need to be able to express our emotions. We need to be able to express them to our Lord, and we need to be able to express them to others.”

  3. What’s Beneath it all? Sylvia Schroeder considers her cries to God for her daughter’s life, “Were my begging pleas like the Israelites in the Old Testament in their whining complaints? Did my request resemble theirs when they craved meat and disdained manna in the wilderness? Did He grow tired of my pleas?”

  4. Banksy and Beauty from Ashes: Tim Challies with a reflection on a graffiti artist’s statement, “Not too long ago, I read that the mysterious artist Banksy had created several new murals in Ukraine. Going to locations that had experienced the fury of war, he found broken and damaged buildings and used them as his canvas.”

  5. Four Reasons to Be Early to the Sunday Gathering: I appreciate Jacob Crouch’s simple admonitions to church-goers here, “Try showing up just 10 minutes early next week. This isn’t a law from on high, but I really think this could be a prudent way to make the most of a Sunday morning.”

How To Battle Lust

How To Battle Lust

Sexuality saturates our culture. The human heart, already an engine inclined toward malformed desires, has plenty of fuel available via the internet alone to propel it toward disaster. How can we remain pure in a world bent on dragging us into impurity?   

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Which Sins are Feeding Your Sin of Lust? David Powlison talks about how important it is to press into the sin behind the sin of lust. He shares a breakthrough with one client, “Look what we just found out: another movie was playing in a theater next door. Suddenly we were not only dealing with a couple of bad behaviors: viewing pornography and masturbating. We were dealing with anger at God that was driving those behaviors. What was that about?”

  2. How to Give (and Receive) Repentance: Blake Glosson begins with this fun question, “Imagine you’re on Family Feud and Steve Harvey gives the following prompt: “We asked 100 sinners, ‘Name one reason why you do not repent of your sin to one another.’ The top seven answers are on the board.” What do you think the most common answers would be?”

  3. Don’t Always Be Efficient: If you’re like me, you might need this word from Seth Lewis. He asks, “Who wants an efficient friendship? Or marriage? Who would want to visit an efficient park, or art museum? Who prefers drive-through fast food to a slow evening meal where the conversation lasts longer than the courses? It’s great to be efficient, but it’s not always great.”

  4. Even the Darkness: Meredith Beatty shares, “As a child I was afraid of the dark, afraid that something sinister lurked under my bed just waiting to grab the stray toe hanging off the edge. But as an adult there’s a different kind of darkness, not literal, but just as scary. It’s one no one seeks and can descend upon us at any time. An uninvited blackout that clouds our hearts and brings despair.”

  5. Naturalism is Nonsense: The late RC Sproul doesn’t mince words in this short clip.

What I Read in 2021 (and Maybe What You Should Read in 2022)

What I Read in 2021 (and Maybe What You Should Read in 2022)

I’ve been able to hit the 100-plateau of books the past few years. This year I read 111 books (the symmetry of that number made me smile). If you wonder how I read that much, this post might help spur you on and provide some practical pointers in your reading journey in 2022. I love reading for many reasons. It’s a gift to be in conversation with a multitude of wise voices, to be invited into the imaginative worlds of some of the best minds of our time, and to grow in empathy and understanding as I step into the shoes of those very different from myself.

I love the gift of reading books with friends. Most of the books I read are recommended by friends and I love it when friends read a book I recommend. If you read any of the books recommended below, I would love to hear what you think. And I would love to hear what your favorite books of 2021 were. If you want fuller reviews on any of the books listed above or just want to connect on an ongoing basis about reading, I encourage you to friend me on Goodreads.

Let me start with my three favorite books of 2021, and then we will get to the rest of the action:

What I Read in 2020 (and What You Might Want to Read in 2021)

What I Read in 2020 (and What You Might Want to Read in 2021)

In 2019 I read 101 books, which was a personal high for me, at least since I’ve been keeping track. I expected to tail off that number in 2020. And then COVID-19 struck. With fewer social gatherings than ever and more quiet nights at home, my reading actually increased. A new high-water mark for books resulted: 115.

2020 was also a year that provided plenty of internal reasons to need the companion of books. I read loads from other pastors and leaders on how they were navigating leading through COVID (given the immediacy of the issue, most of that was by way of blogs, not books). The fracturing of the nation over issues of race and racism had me diving deep on that topic. I’m still processing much of that, but I do plan on sharing more about what I’m learning about race and racism on my blog in the future.

2020 also saw the publication of my first book (co-authored with Benjamin Vrbicek), giving me a new appreciation for the labor of love every author has in bringing a book into the world. Thank you to those who read Blogging for God’s Glory in a Clickbait World. I’m grateful you let Benjamin and I spend several hours with you.

Let me start with my three favorite books of 2020.

A Picture of Strength in Weakness

A Picture of Strength in Weakness

The most important influence to my pastoral counseling is from David Powlison. Powlison was a professor at the seminary my wife Angel graduated from and has had an indelible impact on her counseling. I had the chance to meet Powlison face-to-face a handful of times and was deeply impacted by his ministry both through Angel and through his writing. Seeing with New Eyes is the most important book I’ve ever read on Biblical counseling.

A month ago David Powlison died of cancer at age 69. He lived his last months as he lived his life: full of grace. In the midst of diminishing strength, Powlison used his trial with cancer as a trumpet for the gospel. In my Angel’s words, “He longed for God’s glory and God gave him that gift early.”

Weeks before Powlison died he wrote the closing comments at Westminster Theological Seminary’s graduation where they were delivered by his friend and colleague, Mike Emlet. Powlison’s call to step into God’s grace in the midst of our weaknesses is doubly powerful because it is a truth spoken in the midst of an extreme trial. It is a very picture of what he is speaking of: strength in weakness.

May we too be unafraid to be weak for the sake of the revelation of the strength of God.

Here is what Powlison said:[i]

Shining Idols: Uncovering and Uprooting Them

Shining Idols: Uncovering and Uprooting Them

What are the idols of your heart? What are the ways in which you have allowed your heart which is intended to worship God, to worship the golden calves that surround us?[i] There are several ways to diagnose our hearts. Ask yourself the question: what keeps me up when I’m trying to sleep? What do I fear? What do I think about? What do I daydream about? What gets me most excited in life? What do I give myself to? What do you use your time for?[ii]

Often what we will first uncover are the superficial idols. Maybe it’s pornography or adultery, or maybe it’s alcohol, television, or shopping. Or maybe it’s fitness, sports, work, patriotism, or family. Everything can be turned into an idol. And these gods are rarely solitary.[iii] Gods open doors for gods. Culturally, we are often taught therapeutic methods to deal with these idols, often exchanging one idol with another seemingly “good” idol. We exchange pornography for patriotism, alcohol for fitness, television for family and think that we’ve fixed ourselves, but we haven’t. We are still worshiping a god. There are many churches out there who preach the good news of these better gods: family and patriotism and financial security. But these are still gods, and while they are good gifts from the Giver, they are still just gifts.

But there are deeper idols that lurk behind these superficial idols. The enemy is quite content to have us replace these superficial idols with "better" idols that serve the same function in our lives. What lies deeper? What are you trying to get when you crave coming home and collapsing on the couch and watching TV? What need are you filling when you shop?

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations

1.       An Open Letter to a Suffering Christian: David Powlison with simple, but powerful words, " Suffering must be walked through one step at a time. Be honest. Don’t take any shortcuts. Let each day’s trouble be sufficient for that day. Seek your Father. If you seek him, you will find him."

2.       Don't Settle for Artificial Intimacy: One of my favorite author on marriage, Gary Thomas, with an insightful look into artificial intimacy, "Every season of life tempts us to stop building our marriages. Rather than grow together in true intimacy, far too many couples exist only on what I call "artificial intimacy." They've never intentionally built intimacy but rather were trapped by an infatuation that felt like it fell from heaven. They never had to work at it; it just was. Once it died, their intimacy died with it. An artificial intimacy can be sustained for a time by the common events of life, but usually it comes to a huge crash..."

3.       Moms Have Always Worked: Hannah Nation's study of the Puritans reveals a deficiency in the way we typically think about work. I wholeheartedly agree with Nation's thesis, "Although these divides still haunt us to this day, our economy is changing once again. As more and more work goes online and we transition to an information economy, the options available to women are also changing, making the demarcation between “working mom” and “stay-at-home mom” less visible. Arguably, then, we are shifting (even if slowly) back toward the more holistic and unified world of Puritan New England."

4.       A Father's Memoir of Miscarriage: Powerful reflection by Eric Schumacher, "We discussed it and chose silence. We told no one. We feared drawing attention away from their loss onto ours. Others were suffering “worse” than we were. After all, how did the uncomplicated and almost unnoticed loss of an unexpected and unannounced pregnancy compare to their painful and public suffering? They “deserved” the sympathy and the support more than we did. And there it was, that first little fox in the vineyard of grief—comparison. A ruthless enemy, comparison is quick to use your family, your wife, your children, and your friends against you. Comparison sunk its teeth in deeper with each of the three subsequent miscarriages, further stifling my grief... The gospel speaks a better word than the bark of comparison. It speaks of a Father who notices and values the minutia of his world—even the parts that others deem worthless by comparison."

5.       It's Not You: How our Phones are Designed to Be Addicting:  The 3 design elements that make smartphones more like slot machines than tools, explained by Google’s former design ethicist.