Christian Living, Forgiveness, Identity, Relationships, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
How Do You Forgive Someone Is Gone?

“I want to forgive him, but how do I forgive someone who died years ago?”
“I want to forgive her, but I don’t have any way to contact her.”

Do you have someone in your life that you want to forgive, but you don’t know how to because they are no longer in your life or perhaps they have passed away? How do you respond?

The misunderstanding.
Sometimes we confuse or conflate forgiveness and reconciliation. Forgiveness is releasing someone of a debt that is owed to us (see the parable of the unforgiving servant in Matt 18:23-35).

How Do You Forgive Someone Is Gone?
Recommendations, Culture, Family, Sexuality, Social Media
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. I have called you friends: Alastair Roberts says, “Jesus came to make us friends of God, people with the same standing with God that our father Abraham had. As friends of God, we enjoy an intimacy with God and a participation in his work quite exceeding that of servants.”

  2. What draws me back? Three arguments for the faith on the days I doubt: Trevin Wax says, “The reason the problem of evil delivers such an emotional wallop for me is because of the bigger problem of good—the gratuitousness of beauty and goodness in our world, and the consequent ache in our hearts

This Week's Recommendations
Christian Living, Family, Hospitality, Relationships
John Beeson
A Candy Shop Owner, a Customs Officer, and a ...

We stepped into the candy shop and could feel it immediately. We were welcome here. And no, it wasn’t just the aroma of chocolate wafting through the air (although that helped!). It was in the kind eyes of the shop owner, in the smile of her employee as she swept the floor. The sign outside said the shop closed five minutes earlier. “Are you sure it’s okay we come in?” I cautiously asked. “Of course!” she said. And I could feel that she meant it.

The atmosphere in her candy shop stood in stark contrast to the cold, unwelcoming atmosphere of several other shops we had visited

A Candy Shop Owner, a Customs Officer, and a Beloved Family
Family, History, Parenting, Politics, Recommendations
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. The Chocolate Lady: Andrea Sanborn shares, “Parents of people with disabilities long for our children to be welcomed and included. Any effort in that direction can quite literally bring us to tears. But those of us who parent the socially challenging ones are especially moved when a person makes a concerted effort to befriend our children. Most people, understandably, back off when they’re rebuffed. But a precious few strive to understand and are willing to persevere to befriend our children in spite of their behavior.”

  2. Learning from King David’s midlife failure: Jim Newheiser says,

This Week's Recommendations
Culture, Faith, Parenting, Politics, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
The seat of the Scoffers

How loud are the voices of scoffers in your life? The mockers, the angry, the rude, the crass. How much ear do you give to those who tear you down rather than gently exhort or build you up?

Ours is the age of the scoffer. Election season magnifies the scorn that lies just beneath the surface. TikTok, X, YouTube, and Facebook serve our prurient interest in watching others be “slammed,” “knocked down,” and “exposed.” The equation seems simple: the harsher the persona, the more views.

The longest book of the Bible, the songbook of the people of God,

The seat of the Scoffers

Relationships

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How Do You Forgive Someone Is Gone?

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How Do You Forgive Someone Is Gone?

“I want to forgive him, but how do I forgive someone who died years ago?”
“I want to forgive her, but I don’t have any way to contact her.”

Do you have someone in your life that you want to forgive, but you don’t know how to because they are no longer in your life or perhaps they have passed away? How do you respond?

The misunderstanding.
Sometimes we confuse or conflate forgiveness and reconciliation. Forgiveness is releasing someone of a debt that is owed to us (see the parable of the unforgiving servant in Matt 18:23-35).

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A Candy Shop Owner, a Customs Officer, and a Beloved Family

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A Candy Shop Owner, a Customs Officer, and a Beloved Family

We stepped into the candy shop and could feel it immediately. We were welcome here. And no, it wasn’t just the aroma of chocolate wafting through the air (although that helped!). It was in the kind eyes of the shop owner, in the smile of her employee as she swept the floor. The sign outside said the shop closed five minutes earlier. “Are you sure it’s okay we come in?” I cautiously asked. “Of course!” she said. And I could feel that she meant it.

The atmosphere in her candy shop stood in stark contrast to the cold, unwelcoming atmosphere of several other shops we had visited

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Oatmeal Cookies Don't Make You Healthy

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Oatmeal Cookies Don't Make You Healthy

Trigger warning: I love oatmeal cookies. I don’t just put up with them. I like the average oatmeal cookie better than the average chocolate chip cookie.

If I haven’t lost you yet, I’ll admit that beyond loving the taste and texture of oatmeal cookies, I’ll confess there is also the ancillary benefit of feeling healthy when you eat oatmeal cookies. I mean, you’ve got your whole grains, your dried fruit, your nuts. They’re practically health food, right?

A quick search on the internet proves otherwise: one Costco oatmeal cookie clocks in at 230 calories, 9 grams of fat, and 20 grams of carbs.

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How To Waste Your Counseling

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How To Waste Your Counseling

Our counselor sat behind his oak desk, a wide smile peeking out from under his white mustache. “Where do I know him from?” I asked myself. His gentle eyes reassured me. Angel and I slid into the love seat facing him. It was my first counseling session. Angel’s, too. We were here for pre-marital counseling.

My anxiety grew as I placed where I knew him from. I had taken his daughter to winter formal a few years back. My heart rate rose a bit. Any chance of genuine transparency went out the window with that connection.

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Seasons of Marriage

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Seasons of Marriage

You are on a date night with your wife, observing the people around you.

“First date?” you ask. “For sure!” she says, noticing the telltale signs. The young lady carries a single rose. The young man is a little nervous. They are slightly overdressed for the restaurant. Eyes locked, their attention is rapt on one another. Cell phones never make an appearance.

 Young love.

A mom and dad in their late thirties burst into the restaurant with three boisterous children guffawing at a joke. They divide and conquer: dad takes the two boys to the bathroom while mom settles herself and their daughter into the chair.

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Why Do I Have to Keep Forgiving?

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Why Do I Have to Keep Forgiving?

“Why do I have to keep forgiving them?” It’s a question I’ve heard many times as a pastor, said in different ways and sometimes meaning different things.

It can be said with weariness and hurt, or anger and bitterness, or confusion and longing.

It can mean, “It hurts too much to keep forgiving them for repeated sins.”

It can mean, “Can’t I just overlook their sin against me?”

It can mean, “They hurt me so deeply they don’t deserve any more forgiveness.”

It can mean, “Why am I still hurting over a particular sin when I said I forgave them?”

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The Cost of Awkward

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The Cost of Awkward

The next day, the extended family hosted a party for us. As we drove up to the farm, the pressure of meeting a whole group of strangers began to mount. I felt like the boyfriend from the city visiting his girlfriend’s family farm in a Hallmark movie. To quote Megamind (voiced by Will Ferrell), I was “shaking in my custom baby-seal leather boots.”

The men headed outside to lawn chairs while the women stayed inside. I drifted outside with a group of men I had never met and sat down. I had a beer in my left hand like the rest of the guys, but unlike everyone else…

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A Healing Place

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A Healing Place

It was a long week. I felt sniped at by a handful of complaints from congregants. I was fighting for a spirit of gratitude as frustration grew in my heart. I stepped into a meeting and did my best to be present, but the inner critic’s voice was loud. I asked a simple question to kick things off: “Where is God growing you?” Tears welled in the eyes of the woman across from me. “New Life is my safe place, my growing place. New Life is my healing place. Every time I come to church, it feels like a hug.”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. Should Christians flip tables like Jesus? Alan Noble concludes, “Scripture intentionally emphasizes humility and servanthood over anger and strong language. We should do likewise. We must follow Jesus knowing his actions are different from our own. We do not need to imitate his every act to be his faithful follower.”

  2. Burnout looks different across the org chart: watch for these signs: Daisy Auger-Dominguez begins, “Workplace burnout is often discussed as if it were a single condition with a single solution: fewer hours, better boundaries, more resilience. That framing is incomplete and misleading.”

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. The quiet grief of adult friendship: Pranav Jain reflects, “Somewhere between “Let’s catch up soon” and “Sorry, life has been hectic”, adult friendship became one of the most emotionally significant and least discussed losses of modern life.

  2. Created to play: Brianna Lambert says, “Scientists admit that of all creatures, humans play the most, noting, “We are built to play and built through play” (Stuart Brown, Play). And God does just that. He builds us through our hobbies and gives us his own titles.”

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