Christian Living

Grieving God’s Heart

Grieving God’s Heart

When was the last time you grieved? Can you remember how your stomach was turned in knots? Did you have difficulty breathing? How did your body respond to the emotional pain of grief? We physically feel our emotional and spiritual pain. God’s pain isn’t less than ours, it is greater. Do you think it’s possible to hurt God’s feelings? Because that’s what we do every time we sin. Our sins break God’s heart.

Our fickle and deceptive hearts whisper lies to us, “No one will know.” “This won’t hurt anyone.” “Protect yourself.” “It’s really not that bad.” “It only happened once.” Even if those lies are true about others (are they ever?), they are never true about God. Our sins grieve God.

How can I Forgive Them?

How can I Forgive Them?

“Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die,” Marianne Williamson once said. Look into the eyes of the most bitter person you know and you’ll find unforgiveness. We can all identify the destructive power of unforgiveness in others, but our own unforgiveness is much more slippery to identify. We have a host of reasons why we wouldn’t release someone willy-nilly who has hurt us.

“How can I forgive them?” It’s a question spoken out of a yearning to release the one who has inflicted injury. It’s a question that is spoken out of hurt and sometimes anger.

How do we forgive the person who keeps sinning against us? How do we forgive the one who sins against us in a grievous way? How do we forgive the individual who sins against us and isn’t repentant?

Forgiveness is mandatory as a Christian. In his depiction of how we ought to pray, Jesus ties up with our forgiveness with the forgiveness we offer, “and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors” (Matt 6:12).

Knowing that we will probably choke on that commandment, Jesus offers an explanation for the stakes of our forgiveness at the end of his prayer, “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matt 6:14-15). Goodness gracious. There it is, in black and white. We must forgive the one who has offended us.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations

1. 5 Truths Those with Jobs Need to Hear: Daniel Darling’s post is loaded with important truth. He says, “The gospel changes the way we see our work. It adds a newfound significance. It elevates us from hum-drum, cynical employees to servants of the King. Every day may not feel like heaven, but every day at the job matters in heaven.

2. Wade in the Water: Seth Lewis offers insight on the priests wading in the waters of the Jordan before God parted the river. He says, “the feet of the priests were still wet. They were wet because they had to “wade in the water” before God “troubled the water” for them. They had to obey before they saw the provision.”

3. How to See Mt. Ranier: Rick Conrad with a great little illustration about seeing the Bible as God’s Word, “And so, if you do want to see the glory of Mt. Rainier (and I do recommend it), there are two things that need to happen. First of all, God needs to remove the fog. And secondly, you need to be standing in a place where, if the fog is lifted, you will have a view of the mountain.”

4. Take Time to Be Unproductive: Kelly Kapic’s article hit me between the eyes. He starts his post with this thought, “Søren Kierkegaard, a nineteenth-century Danish theologian and social critic, once wrote in his journal, “The result of busyness is that an individual is very seldom permitted to form a heart.” We sense in our souls he is right. Unrelenting busyness — running here and there, late and in haste, always with more to do than we have time for — stifles the life of the heart.”

5. Be Still: Lee Hutchings confesses, “I never made a conscious decision to avoid or keep away from quiet. But as I evaluate my regular habits and routines, I am startled to observe that most of my day is filled with continuous screens, sounds, and other noise, which in and of themselves can be wonderful and advantageous. I suspect I'm not alone.”

It's (Not) Too Late to Apologize

It's (Not) Too Late to Apologize

“It’s too late to apologize,” Timbaland sang to his girlfriend who he couldn’t trust any longer.

The 2007 song struck a chord. How many of us have people in our lives that we can’t imagine forgiving? How many of us have people in our lives we can’t imagine apologizing to? We can’t imagine apologizing to them, because of that, or right now. Better to just try to make it up, or smooth it over, we tell ourselves.

“It’s too late to apologize.”

We live in an apology-averse culture. We are allergic to repentance and equally allergic to forgiveness.

Think about it. When was the last time someone repented to you? I mean, truly repented?

Not long ago a congregant apologized to me. The email began this way (I’ve tweaked it only to protect the one who sent it), “I might have been a little harsh in my email.. I had a very bad week…” In further communication, the individual referenced their apology. Internally I scratched my head. “When did they apologize?” I dug back through the email thread and saw those phrases. That is what they were referencing.

“I might have…” followed by an excuse is no apology.

I don’t say that to attack the individual I am referencing. In fact, I completely understand why, given the slipperiness of our hearts, and in our culture, they would think that they had apologized.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations

1. Money is Not the Problem: Paul Tripp with some important but hard truth about our relationship with money, "Money sanity does not begin with a budget but with humble, honest, and heart-level confession that is without excuse or shifting the blame. Where, when it comes to your money, is God calling you to honest confession of heart and hands?"

2. Pastors Identify What Idols Their Congregations Struggle With: Marissa Postell shares recent research in which "[M]ore than half of U.S. Protestant pastors believe comfort (67%), control or security (56%), money (55%) and approval (51%) are idols that have significant influence on their congregations." Parenthetically, perhaps most alarming to me was that the numbers were as low as they were… and that 14% of pastors said their congregations don't struggle with any (!) of these idols.

3. Five Questions I Wish My Accountability Partner Would Ask Me: This is surprisingly good, and I encourage you to incorporate it with your close friends. Brad Hambrick begins by explaining that he doesn't like the term "accountability partner." He says, "Can I contradict the title of this post in the first sentence? I don't like the word "accountability partner" any more than I like the word "diet," and I dislike them both for the same reason. They sound like an exception and a punishment rather than a lifestyle and a gift."

4. Ashamed Sinner, Unashamed Savior: Erik Raymond encourages us, "When you're in the midst of guilt and shame—which we should rightly feel in the midst of sin—we have to take all that he has done and his promises to God and see that he's actually not ashamed of us. It's not that he excuses sin, but he welcomes sinners."

5. Terrestrials: The Mastermind: This NPR podcast examining the intelligence of octopi is aimed at kids, but I had so much fun listening to it, and I bet you will also.

Living on a Single Income with No Mortgage

Living on a Single Income with No Mortgage

I respect my sister and brother-in-law for many reasons. One of those reasons is their wise financial stewardship. With eight kids (you can read the story of why they have eight kids here), they are able to live on a single income, and they managed to pay off the mortgage on their previous house several years ago. That financial flexibility allowed them to purchase a home with my parents two years ago so they could help my dad whose mobility suffered after a series of strokes. There are many who would like to be mortgage-free. Below is the story of how by sister and brother-in-law learned to faithfully care for the finances God has blessed them with. In my interview, I hope you hear how often Sarah and Anders come back to a desire to be generous.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations

1. To All the Girls Told They’re Intimidating: Phylicia Masonheimer begins, “You’ve been told you’re too much: Too much education, too much though, too much boldness, too much confidence, too ‘together’. Too much to date. Too much for men. Too much for women. Too much for the church.”

2. 3 Ways the Modern World Destroys Your Joy, Hope, and Faith in Everything (and How to Fight Back): Carey Nieuwhof distills a lot in this post. Choice, for instance, serves to debilitate us. He says, “When faced with the illusion of infinite choice—in our careers, relationships, etc.—we hold onto the false hope that perfection is waiting just around the corner. We mourn choices not made and roads not taken because we’re more aware of life’s possibilities and alternative branches.”

3. The Good We Can’t Let Go: How to Guard Against Subtle Sins: This post by Scott Hubbard oozes wisdom. For instance, he encourages us to be on the lookout for our emotions, “Our emotions are never just givens; they are ambassadors of the heart, sent to tell us what’s happening there. Negative emotions like worry, anger, and sorrow tell us that something we care about is under attack.”

4. Nipping Gossip in the Bud: Jared Wilson encourages us to be on guard against this slippery sin, “One reason gossip can be so difficult to define is that it so often masquerades as something more mundane, perhaps even beneficent. I’m sure you have witnessed plenty of prayer requests shared on someone’s behalf that seemed to include unnecessary details or salacious information. You’ve probably heard your share of “words of concern” that bordered on insinuation or improper speculation. Maybe you’ve offered such words yourself. I know I have.”

5. Astronomy Photographer of the Year: Holy moly, these are incredible! I could spend all day on this one post.

The Worst Hall of Fame Ever

The Worst Hall of Fame Ever

Hardcore fans of sports and music argue about whether or not individuals deserve to be in the Hall of Fame or not. Baseball fans will throw down over whether or not Pete Rose and Barry Bonds ought to be in the Hall of Fame. Some Rock and Roll fans are outraged that Stevie Nicks and Percy Sledge are in the Hall of Fame while Tina Turner and Lionel Ritchie are not. Football fans clash over whether Ray Lewis and OJ Simpson ought to be in the Hall of Fame and whether it’s fair Reggie Wayne and Roger Craig aren’t.

You might know that the Bible has a Hall of Fame as well. Tucked away at the end of Hebrews, it contains a list far more controversial than any list in Canton, Cleveland, or Cooperstown.

Covering Up Our Weaknesses

Covering Up Our Weaknesses

We all have weaknesses and insecurities. Where are your weaknesses? How are you compensating for them? How are you closing yourself off relationally or spiritually from having those insecurities addressed?

Most of us try to hide and compensate for our weaknesses. We are afraid of what others will think of us or we are embarrassed we haven’t been able to get ongoing sin under control. This is one of the great lies of the enemy: that masking our inadequacies is the best way to deal with them, that sharing them will make things worse, and that we can fix them on our own.

This Week's Recommendations

This Week's Recommendations
  1. Blame David, Not Bathsheba. The prophet Nathan Did: Carmen Joy Imes navigates whether it is more appropriate to call David’s act with Bathsheba ‘adultery’ or ‘rape.’ She says, “Those arguing that David committed adultery often try to pin blame on Bathsheba for bathing in public, thereby seducing David, while those arguing that David raped her point to the uneven power dynamics between them.”

  2. A Lack of Generosity Means a Lack of Contentment: Bryan Chappell concludes, “If you knew that your funds were supporting people who need mercy, then you would earn all you could. If you knew that your funds were providing for the security of your family, you would save all you could. And if you knew that your funds were providing for the ministry of the gospel, you would give all you could. That’s why John Wesley said, “Earn all you can, save all you can, give all you can.””

  3. Viewing the Christian Story through the Lens of Our Suffering: Mark Talbot begins, “Often when something awful happens to us or those whom we love, we find ourselves asking, Why me? Why now? Why this? Suffering disrupts our lives, seeming to violate the way life should be. This can make us desperate to know why we are suffering.”

  4. The Elusiveness of Contentment: Reagan Rose starts her post, “Want to hear something kind of mind-blowing? 36% of people making over $250k/year live paycheck to paycheck (Bloomberg). I don’t know what economic bracket you’re in, but that seems like a fair chunk of change to be only scraping by.”

  5. Fighting Anxiety: Learning to Trust and Entrust: Robert Jones offers insight on anxiety in light of 1 Peter. I would add that it is important to discern if there are physiological reasons for anxiety as well that might require medication. He says, “When we look at the world around us and the daily pressures that consume us, like Peter’s readers, we realize how little we can control our lives. We can’t change the economy, the climate, the government, our health, or our friends and family. We can’t make people act the way we want. We have a lot to worry about.”