“This year my resolution is to get back to God.” My friend shared his resolution with me and my heart leapt. He asked me how he could start that journey. I encouraged him to read a gospel and to connect with a church. He’s only been to church a few times in his life and I could feel the anxiety creep up on him as he considered the possibility.
When was the last time you were at church? Maybe it’s been years. Just thinking of your last time at church might make you recoil a bit. Perhaps it was the music, the awkward coffee hour, the rambling sermon.
Outside of Christian music, the song that I’ve most often heard played at funerals is a 55-year-old song from the Great American Songbook. In 1969 Frank Sinatra released “I Did it My Way.” At 53 years old, he reflected back on his life and determined that while he had some regrets, the most important thing is that he did it his own way.
Why am I so spiritually dry? Glenna Marshall reflects, “I couldn’t think of any particular trigger. No big reason stood out to me that would explain why everything felt stale and stagnant inside.”
When offenses come: Scott Hubbard encourages us to reframe when we’ve been sinned against, “Offenses are gifts wrapped with dark ribbons. So don’t let the packaging deceive you. Every snub and jab and wound invites you into deeper fellowship and joy with your forgiving Lord.”
Life comes at us fast. How do our calendars get so full? Birthdays and conferences and vacations stack up. We miss church one week, and that turns into two, which turns to a month. Ever so sneakily, new rhythms have crept in and getting to church feels like a challenge.
“How much is it really hurting my spiritual life, anyway?” you wonder. “I still read the Bible. I listen to sermons online sometimes.”
I’m so glad that you are pursuing God on your own. But your spiritual life isn’t intended to be lived out alone. It’s not even designed to be lived out with just you and your family.
There was a season of worship music from my childhood where a flood of songs were released reflecting on the names of God. El Shaddai, Jehovah Jireh My Provider, and Emmanuel all spring to mind. Interest in the names of God appears to making a comeback in worship as demonstrated by the popularity of Jireh, Yahweh, and Yahweh Elyon.
The names of God have always been dear to his people. The first person in scripture to give God a name is Hagar, who calls God El Roi, “The God who sees”
We Westerners avoid death.
When was the last time you walked through a cemetery? When was the last funeral you went to? Our churches no longer have cemeteries, those who are older head to retirement communities and then to head to long-term care or assisted care facilities. The number of funerals held in churches has diminished. Death has become professionalized, antisepticised, and remote.
Why the world’s greatest athletes don’t get paid like it: Most Olympic athletes truly do it for the love of the game. Mark Dent reports, “26.5% of the surveyed athletes had a total income of less than $15k per year, and another study from the US Olympic and Paralympic Committee found 59% of Olympic hopefuls make less than $25k during Olympic years.”
How to counter the forces that malform your soul: John Mark Comer explains how spiritual formation happens in this brief video.
I don’t know a Christian who hasn’t struggled at one time or another in their life with prayer. We long to experience God as others seem to in prayer. But prayer itself can feel like a massive challenge. In this hare-world of notification and hustle, prayer represents a tortoise reality. We know it’s the better way, but how do we live like that?
I still feel like a toddler in my prayer life, but I long to grow into someone with a rich prayer life. Below are five books that have encouraged me in my prayer life. They are very different. Pick up one that you think will help you the most and dive in.
In the past post we considered the biblical priority of leading in our homes before stepping into leadership callings outside of our home.
When I was asked to speak to our Mom’s Matter group on leading well in the home I was a bit intimidated. I felt far from equipped to speak as a man to women on the topic of leadership. And so, I did the only thing I could think of: I asked wise, godly women who were also great leaders. Starting with my wife, I began to listen to the advice my female friends offered on leadership in the home and beyond.
I grew up in the age of Neil Anderson and Frank Peretti, two Christian authors who used their pens to try to enlighten their audiences about the power and pervasiveness of the spiritual world. I can still picture the claws descending from heaven on the cover of Peretti’s This Present Darkness that spooked me as a child.
As I developed theologically, especially through the influence of Reformed thinkers, I began to set aside these influences, which now felt naïve. To focus on the demonic forces of the world seemed to leave people with magical worldviews, where they held very little power over their own actions, and diminished the importance of mortifying the flesh as disciples of Jesus.
Lifetimes in landscapes: Brianna Lambert with a wonderfully evocative piece of writing, “He grew up in the foothills of the forest. Where the horizon disappeared behind the blue ridges. He’d spend his days with his eyes lifted towards the clouds that kissed the forehead of the mountaintops.”
How to get the most out of your counseling sessions: Jason Hsieh says, “Just as you would take a doctor’s medical prescriptions seriously. You can do this by regularly reviewing those particular biblical perspectives and following through on any new habits to form that you discuss.”
I hope you’ve considered why you’ve left your former church (I’ve written on the ten reasons to leave a church here).
You’ve already watched a service online, read the church’s doctrinal statement, and visited the church. What comes next?
“What does a church believe?” When Angel and I were first married and looking for a home church, I was laser-focused on the prospective churches’ theology and denomination. Those things matter. You will likely also ask, “How solid is the worship ministry?” And, if you have kids, you will definitely ask, “Is the children’s ministry biblically grounded, safe, and engaging?”
A Call to Raise Daughters Wise to Domestic Abuse: Excellent article by Jeremy Pierre. He begins, “’If your future husband ever lays a finger on you, you better tell me so I can kill him.’ This is the extent to which many dads address abuse with their daughters. It feels effective because it’s simple, protective, and tough. And it also feels kind of awesome to say.
Loving With a Limp: Chris Thomas writes, “Maybe, like Jacob, an encounter with God will leave you living life with a limp, serving with a limp, worshiping with a limp; loving with a limp.”
Cords Have Memory: Lauren Washer likens the memory of electrical cords with our inner lives. “Our inner lives have a similar type of cord memory. We inherit ideas, values, and belief systems from our families, faith backgrounds, and cultural surroundings. Many of these are good and right. But sometimes, the way we’ve always done things or thought about things, isn’t good.”
Bend Me Toward the Light: Glenna Marshall says, “When I find myself spending copious amounts of time pursuing distractions, my prayer has become one of crooked house plants and branchy, horizontal azaleas: “Lord, bend me toward the Light.” Distractions are just that—distractions. We aren’t meant to spend our time and mental margin on things that do not feed our souls. We’ll wither up and die without spiritual nourishment, especially if our flesh is yearning for what the world offers”
The Anatomy of an Apology: Justin Hale responds to this question, “I recently did something hurtful to a family member. Shortly afterward, I said I was sorry but the person didn’t seem to accept my apology. I’ve tried to reach out but they are giving me a bit of a “cold shoulder.” They still seem bugged about what I did. I feel like I’ve done my part and now it’s up to them to accept the apology. Should I be looking at this differently?”
“How are you?” you greet your neighbor at the park. You ask the question like you mean it.
“Okay,” she responds. But the crease between her eyebrows and the slump of her shoulders lets you know that she is most definitely not “okay.”
“What’s the matter?” you ask, lovingly responding to her body language instead of her words.
She begins to open up. She and her husband got in a fight last night. Tears begin to flow. She’s worried about her mom’s health. She’s anxious about work. The conversation winds to a close. You would like to pray for her, but how do you cross that bridge? How do you pray for someone in need?
Perhaps the only thing stronger than our natural impulse toward the spiritual and religious is our reticence toward public displays of our religion. Last week we talked about five reasons we ought to press through our discomfort to pray for those in need. Those reasons were:
Your co-worker has just shared with you that her husband was just diagnosed with cancer. You press in and provide a listening ear. But as the conversation closes, what do you say? Nothing? That you will pray for her family? Or do you ask if you could pray with her right then?
I’ve done all three, and there are circumstances where all three are wise and godly responses. But usually praying for a friend with a request then and there is the best response. There have been far too many times when I have not prayed with someone who needed prayer or told them I would pray for them later when the most loving thing I should have done for them was to pray with them right there.
Offering to pray for someone in the moment can feel awkward. Your mind races: do they even believe in God? What god do they believe in? Are they going to be offended if I ask?
Why is it worth the risk to pray for someone in need? And how do you do it?
When we pray for someone, we demonstrate Christianity is so much more than mere platitudes.
One of the most frequent responses I’ve observed on Facebook from unbelievers when encountering difficult situations with others is their promise to “send good thoughts.” The statement itself concedes that it is nothing more than a platitude. What does it look like to “send good thoughts”? Will the one who promises to send them follow through? What happens when those “good thoughts” are sent? Will they have any impact? On all counts: no, and assuredly not. When we say “I’ll pray for you” for many non-Christians, they hear a promise as empty as “sending good thoughts.” By actually praying with them then and there, you are demonstrating that you are not just offering a sentiment, not just dropping an empty platitude, but you will follow through.
When we pray for someone, we demonstrate we have really heard our friend.
Praying out loud with your friend shows that you have really heard them. As you ask God to intervene in the situation and you echo back specifics they mentioned and reflect to God emotions they may not have even stated out loud, your friend can hear your attention to them.
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