Christian Living, Culture, Politics, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Vulgar Authenticity

Who is your favorite celebrity? Your favorite political pundit? Your favorite politician?

Why are you drawn to these individuals? Maybe it is their personality. Perhaps it is because you respect their convictions. Possibly, it is because of their unique style.

Taylor Swift might be the most beloved celebrity in the world. Many have commented that one of the reasons that Swift has cultivated such a devoted following is her accessibility and down-to-earth qualities, from what she wears to the love stories she writes about in her music.

Vulgar Authenticity
Christian Living, Biblical Studies, Religion, Spiritual Growth, Theology
John Beeson
The Faith of Unbelief

Bart Ehrman has perhaps done more to undermine the credibility of the Bible than anyone else in my lifetime. But his story didn’t begin that way. Ehrman is a New Testament scholar and skeptic. Ehrman grew up in a Christian home, attended a conservative Bible school, and then found his way to a liberal seminary where his faith in the God of the Bible unraveled. That seminary happens to be the seminary I would attend a couple of decades later.

For Ehrman, everywhere he looks he sees holes in the biblical story. The inconsistencies that he sees have led him to determine that he cannot trust in the God of the Bible.

The Faith of Unbelief
Christian Living, Culture, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Don't Numb Your Feelings

“Don’t listen to your feelings; remember what Jesus did for you!”

“Don’t be guided by your feelings; listen to what God commands you to do!”

In just the past week, I heard both of these warnings. Two very different Christian speakers urged their audiences to shut down their feelings. These admonitions resonate. They contain truth. It is correct that our feelings don’t override truth, nor do our emotions negate what God has done. Neither do our feelings give us an out for what God commands us to do.

Don't Numb Your Feelings
History, Spiritual Growth, Suffering, Wisdom
John Beeson
Lord, Reach Your Justice Down

I had outsized emotions as a child. Games, especially, would get the best of me, whether cards or boardgames or sports. In response to a stroke of bad luck, a hot surge of anger would erupt, followed quickly by tears and then embarrassment.

Emotions are God’s gift to us in many ways. They are one of his kind ways of showing us where our deep attachments lie.

Our son started his freshman year at the University of Arizona this fall. It’s been a great experience for him, but not without its adjustments. The climate of a secular school is quite different than the Christian school he graduated from

Lord, Reach Your Justice Down
Culture, Generosity, Nature, Relationships
John Beeson
Marshmallows and Friends

Most have heard of the famous Stanford marshmallow experiment. In 1970, psychologist Walter Mischel invited kids into his lab. A child was offered a marshmallow that they could eat, or, if they waited until the researcher returned, they were given a second marshmallow. About one-third of the kids waited approximately fifteen minutes for the additional reward.

The study then tracked those children over time and found that children who waited for the second reward tended to have higher SAT scores and lower body mass indexes. Later tests have challenged those outcomes, but it hasn’t stopped parents everywhere from running the experiment on their kids, often with humorous results.

Marshmallows and Friends

Parenting

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1. Every Movie Cliche About Teenage Dating is Basically Wrong: Chris Bourn begins, "As told by Hollywood, the humiliation of simultaneously being a teenager and being unable to get a date is one of the deepest, most difficult emotional traumas a person can endure." Bourn argues that the truth is quite the contrary, that teens who don't date are, on average, more socially adept and psychologically healthy.

2. Christianity Continues to Lose Numbers in US: New Pew Research report shows important data. Headlining this detailed study is that, "Christianity has dropped to 65% of the U.S. population, while the religiously unaffiliated or “nones” grew to 26%."

3. I Finally Wrote My Resignation Letter: Chris Thomas pens a poignant reflection on exhaustion and disappointment in ministry. "I think I entered ministry too early. Puffed up by praise, I charged forward on the toxic confidence of a vapour made of 90% gifting and 10% character. I was 18 and ready to change the world. I knew what was wrong with the church, what was wrong with other Christians, and what was wrong with, well, pretty much everything. Now here I am 25 years later. I’m 43 years old, and I’m not sure what I know anymore."

4. Are You Too Concerned with Your Child's Behavior? Tedd Tripp asks important questions about our motivations in parenting. One of several important points is, "Many idols of the heart will pollute our interventions with our children. These idols will not motivate us to act for the well-being of our child, but for our own reputations."

5. Occupation Growth and Decline since 1970: This is a fascinating infographic. Some unsurprising occupations on this graph and some surprising ones, too.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       The Average American Hasn't Made a Friend in Five Years: Oh my, this is disturbing news in a new study commissioned by Evite. And the friends we do have don't appear to be that close: "So what about the friends we already have? According to the survey, the average adult has 16 current, active friendships. Of those friends, three are considered friends for life, five are worthy of a one-on-one hang out session, and eight are generally well-liked but not enough to hang out with in person all that often."

2.       What Are Your Sexpectations? Expectations regarding couples' sex lives can be destructive. I appreciate this article's comparison of cultural verse biblical expectations for sex.

3.       5 Keys to a Great Apology: Carey Niewhof begins, " Two of the most powerful words a leader can utter are simply “I apologize”."

4.       Things Stay-at-Home Mothers Aren't Allowed to Talk About: Melissa Edgington concludes this thoughtful post with this perfect conclusion, " Emerald made me a card this weekend, saying she loves it that I “didn’t want a job.” I have never specifically talked with her about being a stay-at-home mom, but at seven years old she is already understanding a little bit of my heart when it comes to our family. I don’t know if she’ll wind up being the PTO President or a CEO, but if she chooses to stay home with babies, I pray that she will find in it the complete joy that I have. Because this world needs kind and artistic and smart and funny women like her in the kitchens and the laundry rooms and the carpool lines, and there is nothing at all wrong with her giving herself to her family, undivided."

5.       Vorticity: Mesmerizing cloud formations.

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What We've Done Well and Poorly as Parents (According to Our Kids)

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What We've Done Well and Poorly as Parents (According to Our Kids)

We have two wonderful teenage kids. Camille is 16 and Soren is 14. It’s hard to believe that adulthood is just a few years off for both of them. With their elementary years not too far in the rearview mirror and adulthood not too far ahead of them, we asked our kids if they would share what they thought we have done best and where we could improve.

What follows is a Beeson living room chat. I hope by listening in you can benefit from both our highlight and blooper reels.

Their list at times converges with our perspective of our strengths and weakness and at times diverges. I didn’t ask for a certain number of positives and negatives and didn’t edit their list, but I did add comments after each item.

What our kids said we did best (their words are in bold):

1.       Trusting us and giving us freedom (you’re not helicopter parents).

I’m so glad to see this on their list. We’ve given far less freedom than some parents, but we have been intentional in these past few years to release our kids in order to prepare them for adulthood. If they merely perform a certain way at home but immediately stop behaving that way once they leave for college, then our parenting was in vain.

2.       Supporting us in our passions.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       4 Mistakes Parents Make With Technology: Jeff Henderson, " The reason many kids are addicted to technology is because their parents are."

2.       A Parenting Roadmap for Social Media: Jeff and Wendy Henderson begin by reminding us, " Great parenting isn’t controlling. Great parenting is coaching."

3.       4 Reasons to Stop Grumbling: Cass Watson says that simply not grumbling is a powerful witness: " Because complaining is so rampant in the “crooked and twisted generation” around us, our cheerfulness will make us witnesses to the truth. "

4.       Americans Vastly Overestimate LGBT Population: There have been a few studies on this. It's important to right-size our understanding of different populations. " A recent Gallup survey found that on average U.S. adults believe 23.6% of their fellow Americans are gay or lesbian." However, " In Gallup’s most recent survey on the subject, 4.5% of Americans personally identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender."

5.       A Liberating Verse About God's Will: Eric Geiger encourages us to rethink God's will in light of Eden, "God’s desire was for Adam and Eve to not eat from one tree, but there was a lot of freedom beyond that. God did not say, ‘On Monday and Wednesday mornings you eat from the apple tree and on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, you eat from the avocado tree but only during odd months.’"

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       You Might Be a Snowplow Parent if... Jen Goins reflects on a trip to Minnesota that has her thinking about how we can easily mess up the objective of our parenting. Two of her six mistakes are: "A snowplow parent shovels away responsibility," and "A snowplow parent clears the path of negative consequences."

2.      Longer Than: This is masterful writing from Jennie Cesario about the how love grows as marriage ages. You won't be disappointed.

3.      What Does the Book of Job Tell us About the Unborn? Jared Wilson suggests that Job 31 tells us three things about the unborn. 

4.      7 Encouraging Reasons to Pray: Colin Smith reminds us what an incredible privilege it is to pray and what God does when we pray... and I love how he concludes this article. What an incredible perspective of heaven!

5.      The Wake of Innovation: From the tractor to talking robots, society has feared innovations. But usefulness usually overcomes resistance. Is today any different from the past?

6.      The Rat Apocalypse in New Zealand: A rat apocalypse? Sounds Like real-life Halloween. Yikes.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.        3 Reasons Christians Cannot Commit the Unforgivable Sin: Michael Bird handles the question of whether Christians can commit the unforgivable sin. 

2.       America's Science-Denying, Antiquated Abortion Law: Ardee Coolidge with a strong opinion on America's abortion law, " [D]espite these amazing advancements in science, technology, and medicine, we lag behind the rest of the developed world in one very important area: our abortion laws. In fact, one key aspect of abortion in the United States is so outdated that only six other nations ON EARTH agree with our position (and one of those nations is the forward-thinking paradise of North Korea)."

3.       Do You Have a Child-Centered Home? This is a helpful questionnaire. 

4.       Don't Compliment by Comparing: Eric Geiger shares three reasons we shouldn't compare when we compliment and then concludes, "Compliment. Be liberal with encouragement. But work hard to offer compliments without comparisons. They are more effective and an indication of your maturing." 

5.       It Turns Out Sexual Liberation Isn't All That Liberating: David French concludes, " Faith and family aren’t guarantors of human flourishing (nothing is), but our nation certainly feels their absence, and our culture aches at their loss."

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       Free Throws Should Be Easy. Why do Professionals Miss? I enjoyed this story from Wired: " On paper, the free throw could not be more straightforward. It's a direct, unguarded shot at a hoop 18 inches across, 10 feet off the ground, and 15 feet away."

2.       Have you Talked to Your Kids About Sex? Helpful encouragement: "The sex and gender conversations in your home don’t have to be big, awkward productions. They don’t have to be embarrassing. And they certainly don’t need to be all planned out. But they do need to happen. The sooner the better. And they need to continue, the more often the easier. They absolutely must be rooted in biblical truth about how God designed our bodies and gave us the gift of gender and sex."

3.        How Relationships Spark Spiritual Growth: This is a really helpful matrix that will help any leader consider how they can grow their group relationally. Dan Mancini says that this process will, "remove hurdles to your growth... And you’ll get down into the root of the junk you’re carrying around in your life, and it will reveal motivations, appetites, and beliefs that no one (including you) knew you were carrying around.

4.       3 Things to Do When Someone is Suffering: Chris Hulshof considers what we can learn from Job's friends: " What does it look like to show up when someone is suffering? It looks like joining them right where they are and getting dirty with them amidst their grief and sorrow."

5.       8 Questions You Must Ask as you Fight Pornography: Deepak Reju offers great counsel. Two of the eight questions are "what lies are you believing?" and "will you be radical or passive about cutting out your sin?"

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.      Why the Devil Didn't Think He Won When Jesus was on the Cross: I hadn't thought this through as clearly until I read this JA Medders post. His final reason is the strongest: " Fifth, as Jesus was hanging on the cross, he is tempted to get himself down from the cross. Why? This would cease his substituting death for us—Satan wouldn’t be disarmed and defeated. But Jesus did the Father’s will, he died and rose again for us. Defeating Satan every step of the way."

2.      How to Mend a Relationship That has Been Broken for Years: Vital Signs delivers consistently difficult, but healthy advice on matters related to conflict: Joseph Grenny offers, " I have come to believe that my capacity for joy in life is a function of my capacity to love imperfect people. And the most aggressive calisthenics of that capacity is practicing vulnerability at times of the most acute emotional risk."

3.      Seeing the Individual's Face: Jennie Cesario with one of the most beautiful reflections I've read in a while: "[T]o grow in the love of God is to expand my heart and vision in this way. To, little by little, allow more faces to become particular to me, more faces to become dear — whether they’re next to me in a church pew or against me in the voting booth; whether they’re my kindred or my worst enemies."

4.      What Teens Value Most: Helen Gibson reports on Pew Research Center's latest poll on teens. In it, having a career they enjoy ranks first, then helping others who are in need, and third is having a lot of money. Getting married is fourth and having children is fifth with less than 40% of teens saying they desire to have children one day.

5.      Is God Anti-Gay? Sam Alberry reflects on this big question during a Gospel Coalition panel (this is a podcast).

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       How to Ruin Your Sex Life in 10 Easy Steps: Lisa Lakey with great advice: Here is just one of the ten: "Don't engage in conversation with your spouse:  It’s been a long day, and it takes too much energy to engage in lengthy discussion. Please, can we just relax and turn the TV on already? Better yet, escape into social media. Knowing what’s going on in everyone else’s lives helps distract you from your own."

2.      You Shall Know Them By Their Clothes: Andrew Wilson with an interesting insight into the story of Samuel, Saul, Jonathan, and David--clothes points to character and plot in the story: "When we first meet Goliath, he is covered from head to foot in scaly armor, which makes him look like a serpent or even a dragon. So when we find the snake-like accuser lying dead, his head crushed by the anointed king, we are not especially surprised. We first meet Samuel as “a boy wearing a linen ephod” (1 Sam. 2:18). Straightaway, we know he will function a bit like a priest."

3.      To Spank or Not to Spank: My friend Benjamin Vrbicek with a healthy and nuanced perspective on the topic: " Yet this post isn’t part of my crusade to get you to spank your children. I’ve never written about this before and don’t plan to do it again. I certainly don’t want to be another polemical voice in the already overly opinionated milieu of Christian child-rearing. Instead, I’d like to talk about how parents can spank their children rightly." All 13 of his nuggets are worth considering.

4.      Pleasures Never Lie: Jon Bloom explains why what we find pleasure in reveals so much about who we are, "Pleasure is our heart’s way of telling us where our treasure really lies (Matthew 6:21). When something evil gives us pleasure, we don’t have a pleasure problem; we have a treasure problem. The pleasure gauge is working as designed. What’s wrong is what our heart loves. And pleasure is blowing the whistle. We can lie with our lips about what we love. But pleasures never lie."

5.      Arctic Geese Jump off Cliff to Survive: This is brutal. Nature is brutal.

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